Yesterday Brenda and I attended a "Life Celebration" service for a dear friend who passed away a week or so ago. His name was Gary Marlow and there was a wonderful group of friends and family who gathered to express their love for Gary.
Gary was my dad's best buddy and my dad's name came up over and over again. It's been two years since my dad passed away and only recently have I felt that the time of mourning has passed. However, yesterday, tears came to my eyes as I looked at the picture display of Gary and saw one of him and my dad during the months when my dad was sick. I nearly lost it because it brought back all the memories of those difficult days.
Gary also struggled with a lengthy illness and though I knew he was going through a very difficult time I couldn't seem to get by to see him. I wanted to avoid having all those feelings I experienced during my dad's illness. I prayed for Gary and his family, but I'm embarrassed to say that I never went to see him.
Sometimes I am that way. Instead of facing the difficult situation, I simply avoid it. That's not a good trait and the Lord has been convicting me of working on it. For me, I need to face the "bad news" at times, because only then am I able to do something about it. There are times when I can do things to change the situation and times when I can't, but either way I'm learning that it's better for me to face it and deal with it rather than avoid it and let it deal with me.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
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2 comments:
Sometimes it is easier to confront and deal with bad news in being able to talk it out with others. I know you have a lot of supportive people. -Mike
Tim, I have the same problem. I never know if I should "pretend" things are normal, or say I'm sorry as it feels so small to say that. I tend to avoid also and I'm with you, I need to work on that. It's not that I don't care or don't have empathy, I really do. I just don't know what to say or how to offer the right words or help. Great post, something to think about...
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